2 Samuel 13:36: “So it was, as soon as he had finished speaking, that the king’s sons indeed came, and they lifted up their voice and wept. Also the king and all his servants wept very bitterly.”

June 22nd, 2023 by Pastor Ed in devotional

This is a long, sad chapter in the story of King David and his children. We don’t know exactly how many wives and concubines David had, but 1 Chronicles 3 tells us he had at least 19 sons by 8 different women. His firstborn son, Amnon, the crown prince, raped his half-sister Tamar. When Tamar’s brother and Amnon’s half-brother, Absalom, discovered what had happened to his sister, he was so angry he set a trap for Amnon and murdered him. Absalom then fled because he was afraid of what David might do. David, with his remaining sons, experienced great sorrow when he learned of Amnon’s death and Absalom’s flight.

All through these sorry events, we never read of David doing anything to discipline his kids as a father. We read that he was angry, sure; but David refused to confront and correct his children. As we consider David’s own past sins, we begin to understand his hesitation at confronting his children’s failures. After all, what Amnon did in raping Tamar was only slightly different from what David had done in taking Bathsheba. And what Absalom did in killing Amnon was only slightly different from what David had done in murdering Uriah, Bathsheba’s husband. David felt like his hands were tied, that he couldn’t rebuke his own children when he himself had failed so miserably in the same sins.

It seems David never took the callings of husband and father as seriously as the roles demand. David had created a pattern in his own life of taking whatever attractive woman he saw. And as God had already warned, there was simply no way any man could properly husband more than one wife, let alone properly parent all their children. That is why God said in the opening chapters of Genesis that a man should leave father and mother and cling to his wife (singular). Just as our love of God is revealed by our love for our fellow man (John 13:35), our intimacy with God is revealed by our devotion and dedication to our family. A father’s heart turned toward God is seen by his life being turned toward his home. If our homes are not different because of our relationship with Jesus Christ, then something is missing from our faith.

“LORD, help us to love and serve our families as we choose to love and serve You.”

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2 Samuel 13 KJV

¹ And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her. ² And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her.  ³But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man. ⁴ And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king’s son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom’s sister. ⁵ And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it , and eat it at her hand. ⁶ So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand. ⁷ Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, Go now to thy brother Amnon’s house, and dress him meat. ⁸ So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it , and made cakes in his sight, and did bake the cakes.  ⁹ And she took a pan, and poured themout before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him. ¹⁰ And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. ¹¹ And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister. ¹² And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly.   ¹³And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee. ¹⁴ Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. ¹⁵ Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.  ¹⁶ And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her. ¹⁷ Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her. ¹⁸ And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king’s daughters that werevirgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her. ¹⁹ And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying. ²⁰ And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom’s house. ²¹ But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth. ²² And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar. ²³ And it came to pass after two full years, that Absalom had sheepshearers in Baal-hazor, which is beside Ephraim: and Absalom invited all the king’s sons. ²⁴ And Absalom came to the king, and said, Behold now, thy servant hath sheepshearers; let the king, I beseech thee, and his servants go with thy servant. ²⁵ And the king said to Absalom, Nay, my son, let us not all now go, lest we be chargeable unto thee. And he pressed him: howbeit he would not go, but blessed him. ²⁶ Then said Absalom, If not, I pray thee, let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said unto him, Why should he go with thee? ²⁷ But Absalom pressed him, that he let Amnon and all the king’s sons go with him. ²⁸ Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.  ²⁹ And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king’s sons arose, and every man gat him up upon his mule, and fled.  ³⁰ And it came to pass, while they were in the way, that tidings came to David, saying, Absalom hath slain all the king’s sons, and there is not one of them left. ³¹ Then the king arose, and tare his garments, and lay on the earth; and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent. ³² And Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David’s brother, answered and said, Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king’s sons; for Amnon only is dead: for by the appointment of Absalom this hath been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar. ³³ Now therefore let not my lord the king take the thing to his heart, to think that all the king’s sons are dead: for Amnon only is dead. ³⁴ But Absalom fled. And the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes, and looked, and, behold, there came much people by the way of the hill side behind him. ³⁵ And Jonadab said unto the king, Behold, the king’s sons come: as thy servant said, so it is. ³⁶ And it came to pass, as soon as he had made an end of speaking, that, behold, the king’s sons came, and lifted up their voice and wept: and the king also and all his servants wept very sore. ³⁷ But Absalom fled, and went to Talmai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son every day. ³⁸ So Absalom fled, and went to Geshur, and was there three years. ³⁹ And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom: for he was comforted concerning Amnon, seeing he was dead.